Brrrrrrrrr

It's cold. Stinkin' cold.

Well, actually, this is a delayed complaint about the last couple of days because today isn't that bad... but Thursday until early this morning?? FRIGID.  I think we're paying for our nice mild winter last year. I guess it's to be expected - we do live in Ontario - not exactly known for its balmy temperatures in January.

But it certainly makes me want to go someplace warm to thaw out... some place South... I'm dreaming of last year's vacation in Mexico. It was the B.E.S.T. vacation with just the two of us... the two laziest people on earth I'm afraid... so it was the perfect vacation for us. We laid there in the sun. Ate. Slept. Read. Slept. Got in the pool for the moments when we were overheating, and then back out to our deck chairs... it was wonderful.

We had hopes of going again this winter, but it doesn't look like our schedules are going to allow it. I'm trying to get over my disappointment, knowing I have a full summer ahead of me... this summer will be different than any other summer of my life - I will be a mom to a little 1-3 month old who will just be getting used to his or her new world...  blows me away.  Gone will be the days of laying there, leisurely reading and napping... but I might get a couple in here and there! ;)

I didn't imagine being one to almost panic at the thought of being a mom... being responsible for everything to keep this child safe and nurtured... I read about how, around the middle of your pregnancy, you may experience some anxiety about your upcoming life changes... I guess I had myself on a false platform thinking that yes, sure, some people must experience that... but I am so excited and "so ready" (ha!)  to be a mom that I won't experience that...  whoa. Silly me. My pride shows up again, thinking I'm better than I am... and REALLY, WHO do I think I am?!?!? 

In this last week I have been overcome with moments of anxiety in the quiet times... like when I'm trying to go to sleep... or when I walk into the house at the end of the work day and see that it still looks like a disaster, yet I have no energy to clean it... and if I feel like that now, what will it be like when this child arrives and my sleep is so limited??  A million questions swirl in my head - "Will I be able to..." "What will I do when..." "How will I..." "Do I know how to be a mom??" 

But before I need the paper bag to breath into (and just before), I remind myself that God is in control. He has chosen to bless us with this little one, and in doing so, He has promised to give help, give strength, and give wisdom if we look to HIM. He is the ultimate Father, and we can learn so much about parenting by obeying Him and looking to Him for guidance. I must trust Him... and let Him teach me how to be a mom who honours Him and loves and raises her child in a home where God is glorified. Raising a child is a privilege and a gift from God Himself... I know it won't be an easy road, but I will look to my Heavenly Father to lead the way.

And first steps first... I will trust Him through the next 18 weeks or so, and then through ummm... childbirth (yikes!!)... :)

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PS. I encourage you to check in on Joanne's blog to see updates on how God is answering the prayers of His people... it is so exciting!

A bit of this, A bit of that

Just a quick update for anyone who has been praying for Joanne Heim but haven't had the chance to read her husband's update on her blog... Docs have had her in a deep coma for a couple days, but have taken her off those meds to see how she responds and evaluate the damage...  According to her husband's last msg on Twitter about 17 hours ago, there have been a few complications including seizure activity on the left side which is supposed to be her good side...  Also, their two daughters, Audrey and Emma, who had been home schooled for the last year and a half, started back at a private Christian school this week. A lot of changes for these young girls and this family can definitely use our prayers.

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Now for just some personal baby rambling nonsense... :)

Naming a real live baby is much more difficult than choosing character names in your fictional story, or writing lists of names you like, or casually discussing baby names *long* before a little one is even in the picture...  in the previously mentioned scenarios, it's one person thinking, deciding, and naming in accordance to that one person's preference...  in real life, there is usually two of you to think, suggest, and... agree.  Glad we get "9 months"! :)

Had my 2nd ultrasound and 20 week appointment. Baby is growing text-book perfect... but I do have a partial (or Type III) Placenta Praevia and a fibroid... if you don't know what it is, don't waste time looking it up. They have hope the Placenta Praevia condition will work itself out in the next 8 weeks, but in the meantime I am on a few restrictions.. but nothing that causes a lot of concern.  Apparently the fibroid thing is very common and nothing to be concerned about because of where it's located.  Oh, and my blood pressure is really low too... but also nothing to worry about - just have to eat frequently (ha) and drink lots of liquids.

Wow - way too much medical information! My apologies.

We bought our crib and stroller so far... quite exciting... I also purchased my crib bedding online over the Christmas holidays, but it STILL hasn't arrived... I'm a little impatient because I want to know if I like it in person as much as I did on the laptop screen. Plus, once it gets here, then I can finalize paint colours... my dear mom is coming up the middle of February for a week... she's not coming for a vacation... she's coming to paint! We owe her. Lots. Cause she'll likely also cook for us too.... here's to hoping! ;)

A question for you mothers who worked before your child was born... how late did you work? I want to take a few weeks off before my due date, and feel I'm not of the personality to go too stir crazy... but what was your experience? Did you work up until the due date? Did you take some time off before? If you worked right up to the due date, do you WISH you could have taken some time off before??  Any thoughts?

Prayer Request

I realize you have many, many things to pray for in your own circle of family, friends, acquaintances and outreaches... but something I read on a blog has touched my heart and I am posting it hear to ask you to pray.

Joanne Heim, a believer, suffered a stroke earlier this week.  She is the 38 year old wife of Toben and mother of Aubrey (12) and Emma (9).  She has written a couple books including "Misplacing God" and "Living Simply"... you can read her blog here as well as the updates her husband is posting on her health. I don't know Joanne, and only came across her blog when her sudden stroke was mentioned on two other blogs I follow here and here ... the thought of these two young girls waiting for their young mother to "wake up" breaks my heart.  Joanne is only 7 years older than me. She was running on her treadmill in the basement when the stroke happened, and one of her daughters found her on the floor in a seizure-like condition. Their dad had already left for work, so you can imagine the horrific panic these girls would have been in. As of last night, Joanne was completed sedated with hoses, wires and tubes running in and out of her body... CT scans show dark masses in her right hemisphere that indicate major damage.

But we know God is over all, and this isn't happening without His knowledge or His permission. He has a plan and a purpose... but we will do what we're commanded to do:  We will pray. Lift this family up before our God - the Great Healer... plead with Him on their behalf... look to Him for a miracle...and trust Him for the outcome according to His Plan.

19 Weeks

I have an app on my iPhone that helps me track my pregnancy, and I have started taking weekly photos to track my growing baby bump. My phone takes horrible pictures (I hope the new iPhones have improved this!), so I apologize for the quality. I played with the lighting a bit to see if it would improve it any - nope. It probably doesn't help that my bathroom mirror needs to be cleaned. ;) Anyway, this little bump is finally starting to look like a preggers bump instead of just... gaining width and weight.

Update!

In case anyone is waiting for the news, though I think the world knows by now because of Facebook... ;)

Jersey Girl had a baby GIRL!!  Kaylee Victoria was born last night at 7:55pm - 7lbs and 15oz... 20 inches long. And she is *beautiful*. She has rosy little cheeks, the cutest little nose and the tiniest kissable little mouth. I saw her for a few minutes after work today, and completely fell in love. She has dark hair that has some "curl" to it which takes after Jersey Girl's hair... and perfect little ears. A perfect miracle created by our Great God.

Both Kaylee's Mom and Dad look great and everyone is healthy, happy and in love. All thanks to our God for this healthy birth!

Sweet dreams....  June now feels very far away today. :)

Waiting...

I know this post should be a recap of our Christmas holidays, but that will just have to wait...

My day has been a regular day at work... until about 57 minutes ago. I took a quick peak at Facebook and found out that my friend, Jersey Girl, is at the hospital! Normally the word "hospital" has a negative connotation to it, but not this time... this sent me loopy with excitement (well, as loopy you can be at work in an exhaustive state)...

So, I have to write here... or I will drive everyone nuts on Facebook by posting a million times with each new wave of excitement that washes over me! Be very thankful...

Jersey Girl's due date is... TODAY. How often do you hear of a baby being born ON the due date?? Not often at all. But it looks like this just might happen... she's been having contractions since early this morning so I'm guessing from the news that she finally went to the hospital means things were speeding up... and for her sake I hope and pray so!

This whole birthing thing really terrifies me... if I stop and think about it for any length of time that is. I know, millions of women give birth all the time. Sometimes, yes, there are complications... but most often, all goes ok with a healthy crying baby at the end of it. This is my prayer for Jersey Girl and her husband (and... for us when June comes!).

I've been telling Jersey Girl that I wanted to know when things started happening... I don't care about the minute-by-minute play, but I thought I wanted to know when she was in labour. What was I thinking??? I've only known for about an hour now, and the wait is killing me!! I'm so glad I didn't know earlier today that she was having contractions - I wouldn't have been very productive at work! :)

So... wait I will... for as long as is necessary... I'm so excited for them and can't wait to hear if this is a little boy or girl. I've had a sneak preview of the names, so at least that's one less thing to wait for...

This is another time it would be great to be a guy.... they don't obsess about these types of things. Typically. They don't wait and wait for news.... they hear initially, then "forget", and then hear the big news when the times comes! Lucky men. :)

Oh, and tomorrow is Jersey Girl's birthday.... what a gift this is!

(just refreshed my Facebook page... and checked my phone for text messages... no news yet... ;) )